Darkness and Light are both part of our wholeness. The Yin and the Yang. The Sun and the Moon.
It’s our natural instinct to want to hide, deny or ignore the parts of ourselves we find unacceptable.
By doing this we are denying ourselves, and trying to squash our darkness (our fears, addictions, bad habits, ugly truths or emotions we perceive are not viewed as worthy by others or society as a whole) into a place we don’t have to face them, see them, own them.
Denying ourselves of the fullness of our own being is when our shadow self starts showing up in maladaptive and unhealthy ways.
It wants to be seen, acknowledged, accepted, and understood as much as our light – or that part of us we want people to know and see about us.
When we can embrace it with curiosity and compassion, we can come to understand why certain aspects of our life are as they are.
When we can learn to accept our whole selves – the good, the bad and the ugly, we gain deeper self awareness, which enables us to attend to ourselves as needed in loving ways rather than harmful ones.
Through this process we allow our shadow to become integrated, and many times this can lead to transformation, healing, new insights and more authenticity.
Here are just a few of many questions we can ask ourselves, chat through with someone safe and/or professional, or perhaps journal about, that may help us gain understanding and new perspectives regarding our dark side.
* What are my fears?
* What do I fear others finding out about me?
* What are my addictions/bad habits and what triggers them?
* How is my global self image? (Self-esteem, self-worth, self-respect etc)
* What makes me feel shame? Where might it come from?
* Do I dissociate from reality at times? And if so, why?
* Where do I have unrealistic expectations, and where do they stem from?
Self love is not about being perfect and appearing good/moral/loving etc, though of course these are beautiful qualities.
But embracing all of ourselves with acknowledgement of our flaws and even demons, means they can be processed, released, or turned into something powerful, but from a place of healthy inner strength and true self love.
And trust me, it takes one to know one ….
Peace🌹🙏💜